Elaine zitner

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Elaine zitner ICF certified leadership and life coach. I help you get unstuck and move forward with clarity and co

10/19/2026

It can be very painful, frustrating and confusing to both know and not know…

To know that you want something else and not know what that is,

To wish you could just be content with what you have and where you are and no matter how hard you try, you still don’t feel that way.

To both want to take a leap and to stay exactly where you are cause at least it’s familiar.

One of my clients said it perfectly “The tension between being afraid and needing to change, I’ve reached the tipping point”.....

You don’t need to know exactly where you’re going before you begin. But getting clearer on what you want and understanding what keeps pulling you back will make moving forward feel less intimidating.

It can be scary to take the leap and it can also be fun, exciting, and freeing. At least that’s the journey with me :).

Want to talk through the thing you keep swirling about? DM me. Or comment TIP and I’ll send you the details for my upcoming small-group coaching session.

10/19/2026

Sorry friends, getting a new job won’t solve the actual thing keeping you stuck in overthinking, swirling and avoidance around what to do about work aka being career confused

Whether you’re in a role that’s meh, you recently left, or you’re firmly in the “is this really it” camp, what makes it hard is actually quite simple.

To know what to do next, you have to know what you want 🤯🤦🏽‍♀️

And while that sounds simple, it’s actually complex.

Hence the spinning and avoiding.

It’s tough being a mid or late stage career pro. You might think you should have this figured out by now. It might bring up shame or embarrassment. And not knowing, especially when you’re smart and capable, is enough to make anyone go a little bonkers.

So you think about it and update LinkedIn, maybe consider some more education….but somehow you still feel exactly the same and the swirl continues.

Been there. I see you, friend. And please know you are not alone.

Knowing what you want can be hard. So let’s start small.

Try this….

1) Track what lights you up and what drains you for two weeks. The big stuff and the small stuff. Make it easy on yourself. Note on your phone. Tell a robot. Whatever works.

2) Use the small moments to start learning how you actually know what you want. Bath or shower? Pizza or salad? How do you know?

Knowing yourself is like a muscle. It needs to be nurtured and tended to and it can grow quicker than you’d think.

I know you want to jump straight to “what’s the job.” But that’s like trying to do 10 chin-ups when you can’t yet do one. (Still a work in progress for me too, honestly. 😂)

Start small. You’ll get there. I promise.

And when you do…the next thing will actually align with who you are and what you want. Imagine that!!

Happy noticing and tracking

✌️ez

PS - I made a freebie walking you through the overall process in more detail. Comment “clarity” and I’ll send it to you.

10/16/2026

Deep breaths. Prep the night before. It doesn’t actually matter if they are late. Etc etc ….i get all of that in my head but I feel totally bonkers in the am trying to get them out the door and I imagine I’m not the only one….

What have you found helpful????

10/13/2026

Other things I find VERY weird about being a human…

That we think we are having a shared experience, but everyone is actually having their own completely different experience because we all make meaning of things differently.

That so many of the rules and policies we live by were made up by some random human at some point…and now they’re RULES.

That I can be in a great mood and then suddenly be in a terrible mood. What happened??

That there’s SO much beauty in the world I could cry. And also SO much pain.

I cry all the time and some people barely cry at all.

The INTERNET. Please don’t try to explain the 1s and 0s to me. I worked in IT for almost 15 years and still 🤯 - lets leave it as a mystery, and don’t even start with bit torrents.

And some people really care about wearing matching socks and others couldn’t care less ( I don’t care, my partner does).

And that we can want something SO badly, finally get there, and then find ourselves missing parts of what we left behind.

Being a human is just WEIRD. And magical. And hard. And beautiful. And everything in between all at once.

Anyone else feeling this? What would you add to the list?
✌️ EZ

10/09/2026

Legit John-Erik Grain and the past 9 years makes me believe in magic... the chaos of this stage of family is truly insane and no one else I would rather do it with, scratches that. No one else I could do it with. Cheers to more chaos and love.💗

10/05/2026

Totally get it. Figuring out what’s next can feel overwhelming especially when you’re already maxed out with what’s on your plate already….

So you put it aside and think…

💸After my next bonus.
🚸Once the kids are older.
⏳After my sabbatical.
✌️Once my boss moves on.
🪩After the big event.

Then I’ll have the time/space/energy to figure out what I actually want.

And maybe that time will come. But if history is any indication, there’ll probably be a whole new list of things by then.

And you absolutely can wait. But what if you didn’t have to?

Good news, you have options.

Option 1️⃣: Wait for that magical future time when all the stuff keeping you busy has miraculously disappeared.

Sure sure. 😂

Option 2️⃣: Start now.

Not by figuring out your entire future, start smaller…

⁉️How do you want to feel?
🤔What’s working?
⁉️What’s not working?
🤔What do you want more of?
⁉️What do you want less of?

You don’t even have to have the answers, just start paying attention and see what comes up.

Imagine getting to that future magical moment of option 1 and ALREADY feeling clear, inspired and excited about what’s next.

What about that?

If you want clarity and momentum by the end of the year and some support getting there, DM me and let’s chat.

And send this to someone you know who’s ready for their next chapter.

✌️EZ

09/22/2026

Hands up if you want to be rejected…

insert crickets

Yeah. Me neither. Like, not at all.

But I’m gonna do it for the love of learning and the ripple effect of the work I do.

People talk about sales as service, feminine selling, methods, maps, strategies.

I’ve read about most of them and yet somehow all I hear is “used car salesman trying to sell me a lemon.”

Which is weird because I BUY coaching and support and all kinds of stuff and don’t feel like those people are trying to swindle me.

But when it’s me? It just feels weird and unnatural.

So I’m working on it.

Asking for things. Inviting people in. Putting myself out there. And being okay with a yes or a no.

Because I love this business and I love my family and I want a life where I get to spend a lot of time on both.

So I’m going for 100 no’s by December 10.

Could be asking to speak somewhere, pitching myself for a podcast, inviting someone to work with me, whatever, basically making asks I might normally talk myself out of.

And if you’re good at this, making the ask without getting all weird about the answer, can you tell me what helped?

I want to hear from real people who actually do this. Not the glossy brochure or the 6-step methodology.

What actually helped YOU?

If you want to follow along with my quest for 100 no’s, like this so I know and I’ll keep sharing.

Oh, and the other goal this quarter: another “How to figure out what’s next immersion”. If you want on the waitlist? Comment NEXT and I’ll send you the details.

09/11/2026

I love options when it comes to what to wear, dinner, how to spend my very limited free time…

And I thought having more options would help when I was career confused and trying to figure out what to do next because I felt “meh” and dull inside.

It didn’t.

Which was annoying because I LOVE a good options analysis. Pros and cons list. Maybe even a SWOT analysis 🤷🏻‍♀️

But I was in my brain analyzing the next job instead of getting clear on what I actually wanted to create, how I wanted to work, and how I wanted work to fit into my life.

I was asking: Which option should I choose?

Instead of: What do I actually want?

And I was letting fear, perceived status and safety run a lot of the show.

Those things matter. Paying your bills and eating food are, obviously, essential.

But they’re not the only things that matter.

I think there’s a way for more of us to find or create work that aligns with who we are instead of fitting our lives around our work.

And a lot of what helped me get clear wasn’t analyzing more job options. It had nothing to do with LinkedIn.

So I’m starting a series on non-job ways to get career clarity sharing what helped me and what helps my clients, in case some of it helps you too.

Follow along if you want more joy, more life and more of YOU in whatever comes next.

09/09/2026

I’ve been TERRIFIED of the kindergarten transition, today was our first hour of gradual entry and now I’m so excited but not for the reasons you might think.

Of course, I’m excited for Jules. He’s smart and loves learning. He’s a little shy at first and then comes out of his shell. I know he’ll make friends and this marks the start of him being in the world without us (as much).

What I didn’t expect was to feel excited about the possibility of me making new friends.

We’ve lived in this town for four years and have built a fairly small community. It’s lovely and standing on the tennis courts today, I realized there’s a whole new group of people for us to connect with and that feels really fun.

One of the best parts of being older parents with young kids is getting to learn from people who have already been through it. So…

Tell me everything! How did the transition go for you? your kiddo? Did you make friends? Was it easier/harder than you expected?

09/04/2026

I genuinely don’t know the answer to this one.

If getting clear on what you want + getting your spark back has a ripple effect on your family, friends, team and everyone around you…

Is talking about that meeting women where they are?

Or reinforcing the idea that doing something for yourself needs to benefit everyone else too?

👇 I really want to know what you think.

Send this to someone you think could use a nudge, I’d love to know what they think too.

✌️ez

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