07/08/2026
Over the years, and particularly in my teenage years into my early 20’s I constantly struggled with body image. I was always self conscious and it affected me every single day. It determined how I felt, my confidence levels & my ability to perform in sport. It decided what I would wear, how I would act and oftentimes made me stay at home when I wanted to be out and about socialising and having fun. I would wear baggier black clothes because I had heard once that black clothing makes you look slimmer. I would never wear a t-shirt underneath a hoodie as my brain was telling me the extra layer was making me look even bigger and I would always sit with a pillow on my lap to cover myself to try hide what I was “ashamed” off. I would be lying if I said it didn’t affect me to this day. It most certainly does but thankfully not to the same extent.
Over the years my relationship to food and exercise has always been tricky, I struggled with severe OCD for years and one ritual/routine of it meant I ate the same meals and foods for months and months at a time and if something changed that or got in the way of it things would not be good for me mentally. I went through phases of extreme healthiness and extreme unhealthiness when it came to food choices and now looking back on it, the extremes highlight the obsessive compulsive disorder I experienced.
In 2024 I ran 6 marathons, 40+ half marathons and not a day would pass where I didn’t do some form of exercise. Although exercise is my anchor, it clears my head and it’s incredible for your mental health there have been times just like in 2024 where it both made me the strong person I am today but but also broke me down.
I’m yet to figure it all out (obviously) but as I grow older and after years of therapy I am in a much healthier place with body image, my relationship with food and exercise. I needed somebody to tell me sooner what I now know, I needed the arm around the shoulder and the listening ear. I needed therapy and I needed more mental health role models when I was younger. A problem shared is a problem halved.
Mental Health Matters ❤️🧠
