KelvinWatts Fashion - Banana

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That lady told me that she only takes fanta, and never touches alcohol . Went out to a club and she ordered this..
09/11/2015

That lady told me that she only takes fanta, and never touches alcohol . Went out to a club and she ordered this..

10/09/2015

LADIES

during your campus days you used to date married men, but now that you are married you are saying you cant share a husband ...my friend take a sit

20/08/2015

A young lady was waiting for her flight in the
boarding room of a big airport. As she would need
to wait many hours, she decided to buy a book to
spend her time and also bought a packet of
cookies, then sat down in an armchair, in the VIP
room of the airport, to rest and read in peace.
Beside the armchair where the packet of cookies
lay, a man sat down in the next seat, opened his
magazine and started reading. When she took out
the first cookie, the man took one also. She felt
irritated but said nothing. She just thought “What
a nerve! If I was in the mood I would punch him
for daring!” For each cookie she took, the man
took one too.
This was infuriating her but she didn't want to
cause a scene. When only one cookie remained,
she thought: “Ah... what would this abusive man
do now?” Then, the man, taking the last cookie,
divided it into half, giving her one half. What!
That was too much! She was much too angry
now!
In a huff, she insulted the man, took her book, her
things and stormed to the boarding place. When
she sat down in her seat, inside the plane, she
looked into her bag to take her eyeglasses, and,
to her surprise, her packet of cookies was there,
untouched, unopened! She felt so ashamed! She
realized that she was wrong. She had forgotten
that her cookies were in her bag.
The man had shared his cookies with her, without
feeling angered or bitter, while she had been very
angry, thinking that she was sharing her cookies
with him. And now there was no chance to
explain herself... nor to apologize.
In life, there are 4 things that you cannot
recover…
1. The cake… after it's eaten!
2. The word... after it’s been said!
3. The occasion... after the loss!
4. The time… after it’s gone!
Let's all be careful and watch our ATTITUDE
ALWAYS.

20/08/2015

A Father was reading his favorite magazine and his little daughter every now and then distracted him. To keep her busy, he tore one page on which was printed the map of the world. He tore it into pieces and asked her to go to her room and put them together to make the map again.
He was sure she would take the whole day to get it done and he could read his magazine without any disturbance. But the little one came back within minutes with the perfect map!
The curious and confused father asked her daughter how she could do it so quickly. She giggled and said, “Oh... Dad, there is a man’s face on the other side of the paper... I made the face perfect to get the map right." She ran outside to play leaving the father surprised.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
There is always the other side to whatever you experience in this world. Whenever we come across a challenge or a puzzling situation, look at the other side. You will be surprised to see an easy way to tackle the problem.

Feel free to share this post and invite your friends to like this page...

20/08/2015

THE OBSESSION III(18+)
(Adults)...... Karen rode me like a pro. The same girl who cancelled a date because she had a meeting at the church?!

All I could do then was close my eyes and enjoy every minute. My hands grabbed her huge bu******ks and squeezed. I was tempted to s***k her but I didn’t want to go that far yet. Just let her do her thing so you can see her wild she really is. After a while of going back and forth she stopped, and began going up and down. I had always considered Kenyan chicks so lazy at s*x. They left all the hardwork to the guys since we are the ones who really chase after them for months. But here I was being fu**ed by a Kenyan chick who fu**ed like a p**n actress.

Karen moaned with each slap of her buttocks on my pelvis. I suddenly wished I was filming the event. I had had s*x with a number of chicks but Karen was the first chick who actually showed a lot of energy in her fu***ng, she made it look like it was her craft and she carried it out with utmost zeal and confidence.

I felt my or**sm approach a couple of times but I tried my best to hold it back in just so I could enjoy the prolonged sensation of being fu**ed by a chick who loved to f**k.

Karen leaned towards me and brought her face to mine. I felt her hot breath on my chin as she bit it softly. I held her face in my hands and kissed her. Her tongue burrowed into my mouth and played with mine. She moaned deeply and mumbled some incoherent words as her climax approached her.

Her hips moved a little faster and with each movement came a moan even more deeper than before. I grabbed her bu******ks once more and thrust into her from beneath as fast as I could. I felt my or**sm coming once more, this time…I didn’t hold back. I went in as fast and as deep as I could and Karen’s loud moans filled my ears. I let out a loud shout like I was in some intense battle and I was mustering all the energy in me to slay my enemy. I felt Karen’s cm drip down from her onto my crotch even after I had cm and fell back on the bed slowly.

She kissed me once more before sliding to the side and caressing my chest. Her hand slid down to my dick. She took off the rubber and threw it to the side. Then she began to slowly caress my dick, all the time looking into my eyes.

I looked at her and still saw desire in her eyes. I was quite spent but it seemed that she wanted more.

“Hey… aren’t you going to let him rest for a bit?” I asked nodding towards the direction of my dick.

She smiled and said… “Remember what I said about fu***ng my brains out?”

“Yeah, I do. I’m still gonna do that.”

“How are you going to do that when you’re breathing so hard after just one round with you lying on your back the whole time?”

I looked at her with a new set of eyes. What is this chick? A bloody machine?

“What are you trying to say Karen? That I’m weak?”

“Hahaha. No. I’m not saying you are. Just that you are supposed to be fu***ng my brains out and my brains are still right here inside my head and not cloudy by any chance”

I thought that she was challenging me. Me, Jonathan. Me who should not be challenged.

My stupid brain didn’t tell me that she was actually using me. So responding to her ‘challenge’ I got on top of her and placed both her hands beside her, holding her down while my body lay on top of her.

“So you want me to f**k your brains out, huh?” My dick had already gotten enraged from her stroking and my sudden excitement. While still laying on her, I kissed her,biting her lower lip and making her moan in pain. While she moaned I suddenly thrust my enraged dick all the way into her p***y.

“OH GOD YESSSSS” She cried. Her eyes shut and her p***y walls suddenly clenched tight on my dick.

Her hand tried to caress my back but I grabbed it and placed it back on the bed, holding her down while I gave her forceful, calculated thrusts in the missionary.

Karen wailed with every incursion of my c**k, her p***y engulfing the whole of it. I began to thrust into her a little faster and her waist moved in symphony, her p***y accepting me and trying to f**k me back. I went in even faster and harder, the feel of my dick on her walls driving me mad, her perfect b***s dancing in many directions as we both writhed on the bed like snakes.

Her moans got louder as my thrusts got harder, she called my name a few times, urging me on. When I felt she had gotten to a point where her or**sm was near I suddenly stopped and withdrew from her.

Her eyes was closed for just one second before she opened it, her face rumpled into a frown and she looked at me in shock.

“WHAT HAPPENED? Why did you stop?”

I didn’t say anything. I just smiled, then chuckled.

I grabbed her waist and flipped her over, making her lie on her face with her ass facing me. I slapped both bu******ks simultaneously twice just like a Konga drum. Now I could s***k her indiscreetly since I had discovered she wasn’t just an ordinary chick.

I used my erect dick to trace a line down her ass crack until I got to the swollen lips between her legs, finding my way in as she arched her back to aid in my entrance. I went in slowly from behind. Each thrust from me made her moan into the pillow her head rested on. The sight of her butt jiggling every time I went in was magnificent. The sound of my pelvis slapping hard and fast on her huge butt was awesome. I fu**ed Karen like I was a s*x starved inmate who hadn’t seen p***y in years. Karen took in all of me and everything I had to offer. I fu**ed her hard and came again inside of her, then I collapsed on the bed beside her.

When I could finally find my voice again, the first thing I could say was…

“You’re gonna take pills right?”

She smiled that crazy smile of hers and said… “you don’t have to worry. I can take care of myself.”

“So… did I succeed in fu***ng out that brain of yours?” I asked.

“Oh well… you tried”, she said and her hands went down my torso and found my dick. She started playing with it again. I was like…is this chic even human at all? What if she’s an ogbanje? What the f**k have I gotten myself into? Hayyy Fadaludd?!?!?!

And before I could let her know that I was tired and we needed to rest, Karen had already slid down to the edge of the bed and taken my dick into her warm, soft mouth.....
**continues **

19/08/2015

The Obsession II (18+)
( STRICTLY FOR ADULT)

I had only known Karen for 3 weeks but she was about to visit my place and spend the night. Not like I haven’t had other girls in shorter time but I hadn’t even put in any effort. After I’d dropped her off that night and she’d given me that kiss on the cheek I suspected she was the type of girl who would want me to really prove myself before she gave me the goodies but I guess I was wrong, very wrong.

She called me around 6pm to let me know she had gotten to my street. I’d given her directions earlier and she’d taken a cab. I went outside to receive her and pay for the cab fare, continuing my role as the near-perfect gentleman. She looked quite nice in simple grass-green blouse and black leggings. When she turned around to pick up her bag I stared at her ass. Oh lordy. I really hadn’t noticed she had all that until this very moment. I offered to carry the bag but she told me not to bother. In my head all I could think of was how soon we could get inside the house, get past the formalities and get in bed with each other where she’ll be sitting on my face as she sucked my c**k.

Karen had actually stopped at a market to get some stuff for cooking. I told her she shouldn’t have bothered as I had already got some fried rice with chicken and salad at a nearby KFC wannabe. She told me she didn’t eat such expensive junk food. I stood in the kitchen and watched her prepare a pot of egusi soup. She even added the chicken we were supposed to use with the rice into the soup. By the time I was done eating the sizeable plate of semolina I felt like I had the strength of a thousand men. It never occurred to me that she wanted me to eat very well in anticipation of what she had planned for me that night.

While I sat in the sitting room nursing a can of Heineken and watching a movie she went into the bedroom to shower and change. She came downstairs in a knee-length nightie that barely didn’t reveal the fact that she was putting on a matching pair of bra and panties. She sat down just beside me on the couch, an arms length away, and asked me this.

“So… do you have a girlfriend?”

I observed her for a few long seconds and blurted out “what?”

“I asked if you have a girlfriend. A girl that’s close and special to you?”

“Karen, you wouldn’t be here if I had a girlfriend. And we’ve spoken about this already when you called me that first night.”

“Really? Like all guys don’t tell lies just to put their dicks between the legs of any girl that they meet?”

I sighed, dropped the can of beer on the centre table, rested my elbows on my knees and cracked my fingers. Then I asked her “Why are you here Karen?”

“You ask like you don’t want me here”

“You didn’t answer the question. Why did you come to my place? This evening. Why did you come and cooked dinner and went upstairs to shower and change into your nightie? What really is your reason?”

“Truth be told, I like you Joe. Ever since that first day at the mall, I spotted you and almost followed you around. There was just something about you. I made sure to stall a bit until you were done so we could meet at the check-out counter. Then I offered to carry one of your bags. Maybe that was a bit too much but something inside me told me you seemed like a guy who I wouldn’t regret getting acquainted with. The other night when you dropped me off all of me wanted you to come in with me and f**k my brains out but I had to give it more time just so I don’t appear to be too forward but I guess… even now, I’m being way too forward. I came here tonight because all that has been going through my mind I felt I should share it with you, face to face and even if you don’t like me that way and what you want is just to f**k me, at least you should f**k my brains out just so I can go back home disappointed, but satisfied.”

By the time she was done talking my lower jaw was a few inches away from the cold, marble floor. I was staring at her like she was a p**n actress that I’d fantasized a lot about who had suddenly appeared out of the TV and into my sitting room. I had no words for what I’d just heard, but the part about me fu***ng her brains out was still ringing in my ears and suddenly I felt the blood rush into my dick and my crotch began to expand.

“Hey, say something.” Karen said as she drew closer and put her left hand on my lap. That left hand on my lap was the button that should not have been pushed. I grabbed her arm and drew her towards me and kissed her. I kissed her like a mad man. My lips were everywhere on her face, her neck, her shoulder, her chest. I grabbed one of her thighs and in one swift stroke my hand was already grabbing her ass, squeezing. She responded by tearing at my shirt, my buttons popping off as she laid bare my chest. I had no idea what had come over me but it had been a while I’d heard a girl asking me to f**k her brains out and so my senses must have been acting on that sentence alone and pushing my body to do what it was doing. Just as my hand found her crotch and I was about to play with her c**t Karen stopped me…

“Wait…” she said.

FOR WHAT? My mind screamed but I said “I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?”

“No…no you didn’t. I just don’t like s*x on the couch… bad memories.” She looked at me in a funny look in her eye but I didn’t bother asking any more questions. At least she didn’t just say she no longer wanted to have s*x. She wanted to, but not on the bloody couch (which had suffered too much from me)

I scooped her up and took her into the bedroom. I lay her gently on the bed and proceeded to get rid of whatever clothing I had left. She lay there watching me with a strange need in her eyes. I got on the bed and kissed her all the way from her toes till I got to her crotch where the black panty still remained. I gently kissed her inner thighs, her moans were loud and very sensual.

With a deep voice that reminded me of one girl I’d fu**ed in the past. She used her toes to tease my body, tracing imaginary lines with them as I bent over her crotch, taking in the sweet scent of her s*x. She urged me on with her moans and with my teeth I dragged her panty away from her. I wasn’t usually this freaky as I liked to get to the business of fu***ng and be done with it but I was about to engage in a process whereby I would f**k this chick and her brains will move out of her head. Something like that required certain skills of which I’d acquired over the years.

Karen was practically screaming when I had my head buried inside her crotch, my tongue twirling as far inside her as It could. Both of my hands had already rescued her soft b***s from the black lace bra and toying with her hardened ni***es. She had her thighs wrapped around my head with her hips moving in a slow circular motion. Then suddenly she twisted her legs to the side and I found myself lying with my back on the bed with her crotch still in my face. All I could think (since I could’t say anything) was “wow, she really knew how to use her legs”

Karen couldn’t just get enough of my tongue in her p***y seeing as we’d been at it for so long and she wasn’t getting tired any soon. While she rode my face her hand was already stroking my c**k and preparing it for the next episode. When it got to when my tongue couldn’t take anymore I managed to free my face from beneath her and take in deep breaths.

“Awww Joe, I was about to cm again” Karen told me. she actually wanted me to keep eating her out? Like I was a le***an without a dick? Bitch naah.

“Then why don’t you climb on my dick and let me give you multiple or**sms?” I told her.

“Oh really?” she said and bit her lower lip. I stretched for my bedside drawer and got out a pack of condoms. I gave it to her and she tore one open and rolled it over my erect stick. She stroked my coated up dick slowly and looked at me sprawled out on the bed with my hands behind my head. She didn’t say a word as she looked into my eye. Neither did I say a word as I looked into hers then she straddled me and slowly put all of me into her. The warmth of her walls on my dick was exciting. I reached for her ass and grabbed then caressed her back all the way to her braided hair. Karen went back and forth on me with slow intent, her eyes closed as she concentrated on enjoying the pleasure of it all…

**TO BE CONTINUED kesho **

Part 1 on my timeline incase u missed .

14/08/2015

The Obsession I (18+)( STRICTLY FOR ADULT)

When I was younger I always wanted to date a nymphomaniac. A chic that would always want s*x. It was a fantasy that I wished for… and almost prayed for. A lady who would make s*x become boring for me. I never got that wish and as I grew up later in life I knew that such kind of girls were rare, very rare. Even if they weren’t, bruh, you really can’t handle that kind of chick, realistically.

I met Karen at the mall somewhere down the line. I’d gone to get some groceries for the kitchen and I was standing behind her while she made her payment. She didn’t buy much, just some hair cream and body spray. I had a whole lot of stuff to carry to my car and she offered to help me. Usually it’s the guy who does that, offer to help a lady in need. A lady offering to help a guy was something I wasn’t quite used to. She noticed my surprise and asked me if it was the first time a girl was helping to do anything and I laughed and said no.

She dropped my bag in the trunk and smiled at me. She was about to go get a cab when I offered to drop her off, as my way of showing thanks. She hesitated, like I expected, before accepting.

I took her number and later that evening we spoke. She wanted to know everything about me. I just wanted to know if she was down for dinner tomorrow. My call credit got exhausted and she called me back. I had to use my Bluetooth headset because the call dragged on for an hour and 43 minutes. At the end of it all she agreed to dinner but not the next day. She had choir practice, so we agreed to Saturday.

Saturday came and she couldn’t make it. She said something about her church having a seminar. Another church girl, I thought but when we spoke over the phone she had told me about her ex boyfriend and so I assumed she must have had s*x with that guy so yeah… she couldn’t be all churchy.

After her failure to show up on Saturday I decided to not call her again until whenever she felt like it was necessary for her to call me. She called me a week later when this fine babe named Rosanne I had met some time ago at a club was sucking my dick. My dick was being sucked so passionately that I wondered how I managed to answer the call and not sound like my c**k was being sucked.

“Hello” she said

“Hey” I answered. “You…uhh..you called.”

“Yeah, I did. Well, since you’ve decided not to.”

Rosanne’s tongue swept down the length of my c**k to my cleanshaven balls and I suppressed a moan.

“Oh, yeah. I felt maybe you were busy with your church seminar…and other things”

“Really, Joe? It was just for that day. I already apologized for that.”

“Okay, I’m…sorry. I should’ve called”

“So what are you doing right now?” Rosanne was removing her panty.

“Uhm… nothing really. You?” Rosanne was putting a condom on my c**k.

“I’m just sitting at home, bored. Can we have that dinner this evening?”

“Dinner?” was the only thing I could ask as Rosanne, squatting with her fat ass towards me, used her hand to guide my dick into her cooch and began to move.

“Yeah, the one we were supposed to have a week ago?”

“Ooooh, dinner. Yeaahhh… I remember now. Cool. This evening yeah?” Rosanne was fu***ng me so good that I could feel my voice begin to quiver and my body temperature begin to rise.

“Yeah” she said “are you alright? You don’t sound alright.”

“really? No. I’m fine. I’ll call you at 5:00pm. Is that okay?”

“Yeah, 5:00pm is good. Don’t forget.”

“I won’t.” I replied and quickly ended the call and threw the phone away.

**To be continued**

14/08/2015

Question 1. Who is a gynecologist?

Answer: He is the only fool on earth who looks for problems in a place where others find pleasure.

Question 2: What is the difference between a cricketer and a condom?

Answer: The cricketer drops the catch, and the condom catches the drop.

Question 3: What is the difference between riding a bicycle and riding a woman?

Answer: To ride a bicycle, you position your ass and then move your legs. To ride a woman you position your legs and then move your ass.

Question 4: What three things are common between the sun and a woman's underwear?

Answer: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear at night.

Question 5: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?

Answer: Because they are tired of using their own.

Question 6: What is common between men and video?

Answer: Both go backward, forward, backward, forward, stop and eject.

Question 7: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?

Answer: Your salary, it comes once a month and last about 5 - 7 days and if it doesn't come it means you are finished

13/08/2015

14 WAYS TO KNOW YOU ARE WITH THE WRONG PERSON.

Heart2Heart With ThankmiLater. Aug 13 2015.

This is how to know you this person in your life is dangerous and will destroy you.

1. This person's lifestyle is not compatible with your values. Eg: You Love church but they Love the club.

2. You noticed that this person have too many secrets. They seem to have a hidden life. Please Shine your eyes.

3. When you ask them questions, their answers are evasive & never straight. Evasiveness is a sign that something is wrong.

4. They don't have time to bond & plan the future with you. If they are too busy to be with you, then someone else is definitely taking their time.

5. You noticed that this person is stingy & dishonest with money toward others. If they are to others, they will be to you soon.

6. You haven't met any of their siblings yet they have met yours after 1year.

7. You can't count how many times they have promised to take you to their family but has done nothing about it. This liar does not love u.

8. Your relationship with this person is build on nothing but s*x, s*x & s*x. Let this nonsense stop!

9. You are the one pushing to meet his family while they watch & do nothing. Who is marrying who? You or him?

10. You proposed, they haven't accepted yet they keep making incessant demand. She a gold digger.

11. They are jealous & very possessive yet they haven't even proposed. Won't this man commit murder after wedding?

12. He keeps shifting the wedding date because he is not financially ready yet he won't allow you walk away. Isn't this dude heartless & you are so blind?

13. His drive for success is low with little or no authentic plan for d future. Is this the kind of man u want to call hubby?

14. All their friends are players, liars, drinkers, party-till-daybreak-types and you still want to marry them?

11/08/2015



Waridi the campus gal
~Episode7~....After kuambia jeshi yangu nimetekwa nyara en who the goons were they came for my resucue en since they used what we normally do best when we are fu**ed up the game left many dead en several injured including my big man RAS MUNDU en two of my men jailed coz still as we talk DAN en MASTER KAFUPI are in jail over that scene with no hope to see them again en me still in exile nt knowing what wil be my story after kupatikana.....lol mapenzi...love can even kill innocent souls!!This is what happened after kuckia mlio wa risasi na nduru ya RAS,"uuuuuuuuuuuuui"...we all thought all thought its one of iyo gang enye ilikuaga imeniteka alikuaga na mchuma na ndiye ameamua kuangusha RAS MUNDU so mimi jamo na dan tukachukua mapostion kudeal na uyo mgoon so jamo akatoka ka ameekewa back dan dan bt we were wrong coz iyo ridhe ilikuaga ya karao....jamo na dan wakasurrender na wakawekwa pingu bt they never said i was in the building so i decided to take my chances to live or to die....,"kucheni hapa nyang'ao nyinyi...nyinyisa ndo mnajifanya rambo eh...urambo wenu utaishia mbele....na mmebakisha wangapi uku ndani??"thats the last thing i heard cops saying to my gangmates....walimulika uko ndani bt thank God hawakuniona kwa kona enye nilikuaga nimejikunjia...watu walijaa hapo kujionea what happened so kelele ilikuaga mingi hapo so i thought of removing mabati moja nitoroke since iyo plot ilikuaga ya mabati...bt kumaliza kutoka ivi vijana walikuaga iyo side ya nyuma walishout,"NDO UYU MWINGINE ANATOKEA KWA MABATIIIII...."Nikajua its now between life en death so nikatoka mbio kujiokoa....kirindi kikanifuata shouting,"UYOOOO....SHIKA MWIZI...UYOOO..." Minikajua hapa nikishikwa that wil be the end of me so nilikimbia mbio ya gari ndogo...kuona nimewaacha na distance nikapiga corner nikaelekea kwenye taka taka utupwa na nikajificha hapo ndani ya taka taka praying my God to help me.....trust me kuna mungu juu....'
To cont..

11/08/2015

Waridi the campus gal
~ ~......So after simu kugongwa ikaanguka thought i should to try my luck coz i do believe in that kikuyu saying that says,"ona igikua ni yikagia thari" en it really worked !!so one of those goons picked the phone on the floor en started talking to RAS bt hawakusikizana so they took the number noted it down then wakachukua sim card ingine kwa wallet wakaeka kwa phone yao na wakacall RAS nayo na wakaeka loud speaker ndo waskie wote....vile ras alipick call yao aliwauliza wao ni akina nani wakambongesha rude bt hakuwaongeleshamingi,he jst,"nyii bongeni vle mnataka bt lemi tell yoh,yo jst fu**ed wid wrong people,i wil trace you en kill you en in that i promise ka hamtawachilia uyo bouy so wekeni lawama mi hapanaga tambua...am ready to dance with u de dance of goons..." kuckia vle ras ameongea nikajua vita imetangazwa kayole..waah bt hawakujali wakamwambia tu"GUDLUCK"...Wakajikosea!!kukata phone ivi wakagongesha phone yangu kwa floor then wakanifunganisha mikono na kupigia wenzao phone wakaambiana kuna jeshi inakuja kuniokoa...!!within ten minutes jeshi ya mtu kumi ikaingia sa wakakuwa twelve...kufikajamaa alikuaga anaitwa kinuthia akaanza kunifinya makende kisha nikiscream anaekea RAS asikie wakinitesa bt ras alienda mteja en the next time to hear RAS alikuaga kwa mlango akiwaambia wafungue mlango ama akate mkubwa wao shingo (ben) sasa..kuckia mdosi wao atauwawa wakafungua mlango bt hakuna mtu aliingia...so mmoja akaamua kutoka kucheki bt ni nduru tu walickia..so watano wakatoka na dagger nikaachiwa sita wakuniangalia...bt walikuaga absendminded so nilianza kujifungua pole pole bt kumalza kujifungua ivi dan na jemo wakaingia...baaaaasi!!! Wote wakakimbia kukudeal na hao wawili wangu wameingia....jaymo akanitupia kisu na mimi nikaingililia vita..dakika tano hao sita tukaeka chini..bt ata ckujua vle kulienda i heard guns shots....nilisikia nduru ya RAS after izo ridhe kulia...."uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuiiiiii...."

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