10/08/2026
It’s the comfort food for me today. 💜 October is full of some highs and lows for me this year, and today I just needed a moment to sit, eat something comforting, and reflect.
Grief after a death is natural. It isn’t linear. It doesn’t follow a timeline, and it certainly doesn’t ask permission before showing up. Sometimes it comes through something small. A word someone says. A song. A smell. Reaching for your phone because, for half a second, you forgot. Other times, it arrives in the big moments. A birthday celebrated without them. A holiday. An anniversary. A family gathering where their absence feels almost as present as everyone sitting in the room. And sometimes grief simply says, “Hey. I’m still here.” When those moments come, give yourself permission to feel them. You don’t have to rush through grief just because the rest of the world kept moving.
A few things that may help:
• Acknowledge what you’re feeling. You don’t have to pretend you’re okay when you aren’t.
• Talk about them. Say their name. Tell the stories. Laugh about the ridiculous things they did. Remembering is not “dwelling.”
• Create a ritual or keepsake. Light a candle, cook their favorite meal, look through pictures, write them a letter, visit a meaningful place, or create something in their honor.
• Take care of your body, too. Eat. Drink water. Rest. Get outside. Move a little. Grief is emotional, but your body carries it too.
• Lean on your people. You don’t have to carry every hard day alone.
• Give yourself boundaries. It is okay to decline an invitation, leave early, change a tradition, or create a completely new one.
• Get professional support when you need it. A therapist, grief counselor, support group, clergy member, or other trained professional can help you work through the weight of loss.
There is absolutely no shame in needing help carrying something this heavy. Grief isn’t proof that you’re failing to “move on.” Sometimes it is simply love learning how to exist when the person you love is no longer physically here.
So today, I’m giving myself a little space for reflection, a little grace... and apparently more gravy then biscuit. 🤷🏾♀️😂💜
Be gentle with yourself today.