09/09/2021
My wife shared this on her Instagram this morning and I felt the need to share it / talk a little bit about this as well because Parental Burnout is very real and should be something you keep an eye out for.
I'll warn you in advance, it's a longer post because I feel this is a very important topic for parents, so being mindful of the signs / symptoms and addressing Parental Burnout early is imperative not only for you but will also benefit your children tenfold in the end. That said, strap in for a few minutes and as always please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below.
In this current climate of mental health awareness I want to address Parental Burnout today because I feel like a lot of parents, especially newer ones, sacrifice so much of themselves for their children and get so caught up in the day to day routines that they often forget to focus on their own feelings / mental health. It's easy to let these symptoms just creep into our daily lives because we're so focused on the kids that we don't even notice these signs of burnout until they’re already well established. Believe me, I know because it's happened to me. (The image below will outline a handful of the main signs / symptoms)
Being aware of these signs and staying mindful of your own wellness is extremely important when it comes to Parental Burnout. If we're not in the right frame of body & mind then we're unable to give 100% of ourselves to our kids during the time we spend with them, which is unfair because often we are their entire world and time spent with Mommy & Daddy is the best part of their day. Being able to fully engage in a positive frame of mind & energy brings so much joy to our children and when part of us is "missing" or "checked out" because we're burnt out, you can bet that they notice. They might not understand why but they definitely can tell when we aren't ourselves, which can ultimately be even more dangerous because they may just think we aren't interested.
That’s why it’s so important to address these issues as they arise and keep an open line of communication with your significant other, your family, or even friends, to ensure you’re able to get the help when needed. A best practice I find is taking a minute or two each day to just check in with yourself. Maybe that 60 seconds to have an internal dialogue comes as you’re getting ready for bed at night, ask yourself how you’re feeling in that moment after a long day. Be mindful of how your body feels, the emotions you’re feeling, you’re level of fatigue that day. Maybe you literally go through the list of symptoms and see if you can check any of them off.
If during this “mindful minute” you find that you do notice some of these signs / symptoms then it’s probably time to start planning for some recharge time. Finding time to “recharge” should be one of your top priorities when you start recognizing these symptoms. Personally I love to golf and play video games with friends, have a fire with my wife or cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie or show together, or even spend time watching Manchester United with my dad, all of these things refill the proverbial battery for me.
That said, sometimes life gets busy and the weekly or monthly schedule doesn’t lend itself well to carving out time to recharge. In those moments it’s imperative that you have those discussions with your support network (significant other, family, friends, etc) to create a schedule for some self care time. For example that might be me talking to my wife about a morning I can go golfing with my buddies that week, or my wife talking to me about an afternoon her and some of her friends can do a little wine tour. Whatever it is, we all need something that takes us away from those daily kiddy routines, which gives us a change of pace for some recharge time. That way we can come back feeling centered and ready to face the day with our little ones with a positive mind & energy and 100% engagement. It helps us and ultimately helps our kiddo’s too.
It’s not selfish to need some “me time” here and there so don’t be afraid to ask for it. Sometimes loving your kids means taking that time to love yourself too.
