23/08/2026
I've always been quite fond of the written word, worshipping it in a way. For the sharing of one's breath of knowledge wether acquired or experienced or invented. For a way of expressing the depths of one's soul. I would often propel myself to read those clinically hard reads, wanting to absorb the knowledge and intellect it offered. The bonus offering was that feeling of being an intellectual, of being privileged to have an appreciation of and understanding as well as a feeling of awe, of transcendence, and very often gaining a deeper understanding of self, or finding kinship where I had previously felt as "other".
I'm still very fond of words, don't get me wrong. Words are sacred. They can't be taken back and can have the kind of effect unmatched to any other intangible form.
Yet, I've also realized there are other means of communication of such, by way of the other senses, that are perhaps equally potent. I believe we're each drawn to these different modes based on our own unique makeup. Our senses can shift, one filling in for another's weakness and it can shift our inner world. If journaling is praised as a way to dump and cleanse and recenter one's psyche, cross stitch is does that for me and has become my daily morning ritual, tho i hesitate to call it that, as a ritual feels eternally binding and I'm open to the idea that that may shift. For now, the slow repetition and focused attention of the in and out stitch guiding my hand offers much reprieve and a rewiring of sorts when my brain is "offline". I don't force myself to read that which feels too technical to hold my concentration for too long. I ask God that if there some knowledge I'm meant to know, that can serve me in any way, please make that knowing come to me one way or another.
Perhaps my intuition or inner read has been sharpened and I now find myself to be visually touched in a more profound way. When I yearn to express that feeling of awe, I can more easily do that by crafting, rather than trying to find the proper words that match the depth of my experience. Cont. in comments.
