07/01/2022
I never really thought I was changing myself to make everyone happy..
But the more I did what they thought I should do and became who they said I should be..
The more unhappy I became.
And not just a little.
No matter how pretty the clothes were, no matter how amazing I looked, I still had that same nagging empty feeling.
I couldn’t figure out what it was at first, thinking I was just going through a phase..
But the mood just kept sticking.
I tried to do the things that made me happy thinking I just needed some me time..
And I was right- just not in the way that I thought.
I needed to start getting back to the girl I lost when I tried to find the person that everyone else wanted me to be.
I looked in the mirror that night and realized that I had become everything I didn’t want to be.
I had sacrificed my happiness and my purpose chasing some illusion of fitting in..
Which I never would be able to do,
And frankly, didn’t want to.
I let the world put out my spark as I tried to conform and please everyone else.
I’m doing what I should have done long ago-
I’m walking away from the people, places and things that make me unhappy.
I’m letting go of the notion that I’m going to blend in with the crowd..
I need to embrace my unique individuality and begin to make my way back to the person I lost along the way.
I know it’ll take some time and it’ll hurt as I change and evolve, but I have to do what I need to do to become alive..
With who I am, what I’m capable of and where I’m headed.
I’ve got to start believing in myself again and uncover my passions once more.
So, the people I’m losing as I grow and find my way back home to myself were never really my people.
My people will still be there, standing beside me every step of the way, always supporting me.
I may not know where I’m going or how to get there, but I can finally see the light and hope ahead.
I’m going to stand in my own light and let my voice be heard and take charge of my life.
This is my time and my choice..
And I choose to finally become the person
I want-
The person I was always meant to be.
|ravenwolf