03/23/2026
I recently reconnected with my Father after a falling out a few years back.
Like men do, we didn’t hash out the past. We just picked up where we left off.
At the end of the call, he said “I love you.” Like usual, I deaf eared it.
We aren’t exceptionally close. Handshakes versus hugs kind of relationship. It’s always been that way. Polar opposites as men. No common ground or similar interests besides ‘hard work’ being in our blood.
But he’s always been there for me in the few times I’ve had no choice but to ask.
Then he said it again. Louder. Intentional. “I LOVE YOU.
F**k. I was uncomfortable. Can’t recall ever saying that to him in my life.
Childhood sucked. I’ll spare you the rest. I got over it.
So I said it back. “I LOVE YOU TOO DAD. First time ever. He brought me into this world and I’m grateful for that.
I could hear him smiling over the phone, if that makes sense.
We never did, nor will we ever really hash out the decades of our strained past. And that’s ok. He is 83 years old and saying “I love you” was forgiving him for a lot, and also owning my failures as a son to him.
The truth is, I wouldn’t be half the man I am if I had a different life.
All the struggles, pain, loneliness, anger and hard times forged me into being the best Father to my children and a successful man able to rely on nobody and still prosper.
So I’m walking away with a different perspective. Gratitude.
If I had everything I needed, I probably wouldn’t have become as much in life or be so resilient.
But going without, f**k. I knew everything I needed and wished I had as a child but didn’t get. That void, pain and empty hole was so damn recognizable. So, everything I wished I had as a child is what I bleed to give my children. And I’m not talking material items…but things that fill your heart and give you peace, love and comfort.
I’d imagine some of you have a relationship to mend. Do it before it’s too late.
If it’s already too late, be the version that those still walking this earth you need you to be.
I know it’s hard. Do it anyway.